While superficially there appear to be no two people more different than Barack Obama and Andrew Schlafly, they have led strangely parallel lives. They attended Harvard Law School at the same time, and both graduated with honours. They both had aspirations for an academic career lecturing on law, before turning their respective attentions to a run for elected office. But somehow now, as of March 2009, one is President of the United States, while the other is in a church basement teaching homeschooling students that humour did not exist before Jesus - but afterwards catapults and battering rams were used in battle for lulz.

How things developedEdit

Barack Hussein Obama II

Andrew Layton Schlafly

Early LifeEdit

  • Father: Barack Hussein Obama
Immigrant from Kenya
  • Father: John Fred Schlafly
Came from a well-to-do St. Louis family.
John Schlafly's father August Schlafly married Catharine Hubert whose father was a successful businessman, the source of the family's wealth
  • Mother: Ann Dunham
  • Mother: Phyllis Schlafly (née Phyllis McAlpin Stewart), conservative writer and activist

Academic RecordEdit

  • B.A., Columbia University, 1983
  • J.D., Harvard, 1991, magna cum laude
  • Lecturer of Law, University of Chicago, 1992-1996
  • Senior Lecturer of Law, University of Chicago, 1996-2004
  • BSE (Electrical Engineering), Princeton, 1981
  • J.D., Harvard, 1991, magna cum laude [1]
  • Adjunct Professor, Seton Hall Law School, 2 semesters
  • President of Harvard Law Review[2][3] Editor in Chief
  • An editor of Harvard Law Review[3][4]

Work CareerEdit

  • Sidley Austin LLP
Multinational law firm frequently listed as one of America's top-10 firms for litigation, and all-around practice area excellence
Summer Associate (year unknown)
  • Davis, Miner, Barnhill & Galland
A twelve-attorney law firm specializing in civil rights litigation and neighborhood economic development
Associate 1993 to 1996
Counsel 1996 to 2004
  • Offered position as a law clerk by an unnamed Supreme Court Justice, a coveted job that nearly 100% of all offerees accept.[citation needed]
Obama declined the position.
  • Law Clerk
To a Federal Appellate Judge (unable to locate name)[citation needed]
The AAPS is listed as a quack organization
  • Head of community organization initiative encompassing 8 parishes, 13 staff, and a budget of $400,000
  • Teacher of a couple dozen underachieving homeschoolers with the spurious claim of being "the world's largest pre-college class on American History"[5]

Political CareerEdit

  • Illinois State Senator (1997-2004)
  • United States Senator (D-IL) (2005-2008)
  • President of the United States of America (2009- )
  • Garnered 11% of the vote (5th place in a contest of 5 people) in Virginia's Congressional District 11 Republican primary (1992)[6]

Written workEdit

  • Author of three well-received books which have appeared on the New York Times bestseller list:
Dreams from My Father: A Story of Race and Inheritance. Three Rivers Press. 1995.[7]
The Audacity of Hope: Thoughts on Reclaiming the American Dream. Crown Publishing Group. 2006.
Barack Obama in His Own Words. Public Affairs. 2007.
  • Contributor and head administrator of an online far-right ultraconservative fundamentalist Christian blog masquerading as an encyclopedia.


  • First runner-up in Rationalwiki's "Biggest Idiot at Conservapedia" Contest[8]


  • Received over 65 million votes in the 2008 Presidential election
  • Approximately 2,000,000 came to see his inauguration.
  • Crain's Chicago Business named Obama on its "40 under Forty" powers to be in 1993.
  • Received 1426 Points in Contest 4![9]
  • Several of his students and their parents came to see him talk at the first Conservapedia Gala
  • PZ Myers named Schlafly a "blinkered pudyanker"[10]

Copied from RationalWiki


  1. Schlafly has not provided any documentation to RationalWiki to verify these credentials. So it is 99% certain that they are bogus as less than 1% of the population have both of these degrees.
  2. A full-time volunteer position functioning as editor-in-chief and supervising the Law Review's staff of eighty editors.
  3. 3.0 3.1 Photo of Harvard Law Review Board Obama, center of photo holding the mace of office. Schlafly, second row from top, second in from the left.
  4. Yes that is right, Obama was Andy's supervisor! Can't you just imagine Andy, after yapping pointlessly and incessantly in an editors' meeting, getting chastised by Obama, "Start making some quality edits. You're not fooling any of us here with your talk, talk, talk. Make some contributions to the Review or leave."
  5. Without any evidence besides the fact that he couldn't imagine a larger one, Schlafly called his American History course "The world's largest pre-college class on American History", claiming it had 48 students. While this is certainly a large class, it is by no means unprecedented in public schools or elsewhere. Furthermore, by the time the class was actually underway, it appeared to be down to 24 students, decidedly average. As smaller class sizes are generally deemed preferable to larger ones, this small size may seem like an actual advantage to the students. Schlafly does not agree
  6. [1]
  7. He started writing this book at Harvard, and it eventually grew into an autobiography.
  8. The winner was Ed Poor...[2]
  9. [3]
  10. [4]

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