Conservative method

3,136pages on
this wiki
Add New Page
Add New Page Comments0
This article is a bit Subjective. If You don't like it ... sorry about that.
Well we know this exaggerates but there's an element of truth.

The Conservative method is the process where conservatives try to solve problems, contrasted to the scientific method.

All Conservatives

  1. Define the question.
  2. Consult the Bible.
  3. Consult their pastors.
  4. Consult their mommies.
  5. Consult their daddies (men count for more than women among Conservatives).
  6. Consult their wives/husbands (especially husbands).

Rich Conservatives

  1. Hire a bunch of accountants to see which method makes them the most money.
  2. Use the plan with the most profit.
  3. Look for reasons in the Bible or in what their pastor told them why the most profitable plan is also consistent with Conservative Christianity.

Poor Conservatives

  1. Consult Fox News.
  2. Keep paying their tithes hoping this will make them prosperous later
  3. Blame themselves for not being richer
  4. Blame whoever Fox News blames because they aren't richer

Also on Fandom

Random Wiki