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Former President

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Here we're parodying Conservapedia and we know we're exaggerating.

"I do bite my thumb, sir"- Sampson and his Statement to the Former President.


A Question of Rule Edit

Twin Towers

It while on vacation.

The title of former president is applied to a list of persons person without what American society considers failings. The persons in question have so far been male and sometimes rather obese.

The most recent former president of the U.S.A. is common information, so why should I waste my breath? Rather, it should be wasted on blowing spit at its face, or, to be Shakespearean, why not try biting a thumb at it?

Facts of it Edit

  1. It posed for the camera in New Orleans to show that it wasn't its fault.
  2. It has caused the Oil Scandal.
  3. It is considered a failure from both sides of the marble.
  4. It isn't human.
    File:George W. Bush Proof Of Monkey!!!.jpg
  5. It is Watching You!!
  6. It will lose in the long run to most liberals due to clogged arteries.
  7. It is an ignorable policy on Liberapedia.
  8. IT is definitely not it.

Quotes of It Edit

"They misunderestimated me."- It...August Fifth, 2004

"Our Enemies are Innovative and Resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we."- It...August Fifth, 2004

"I think we agree... The past is over"- It...May Tenth, 2000

Dick Cheney

This is not it, but its close...

Serious PartEdit

The US President wears many "hats," if you will:

  1. Chief of Party
  2. Head of State
  3. Chief Legislator
  4. Commander-in-Chief (of the army and navy)
  5. Master of the House (1600 Pennsylvania Avenue)
  6. Air Force pilot

NotablesEdit

  1. George Washington - General of the Continental Army during the American Revolution; proclaimed neutrality of Britain-France war
  2. John Adams - Fought hard for independence; saved America from unnecessary war
  3. Thomas Jefferson - Bought the Louisiana Purchase from Napoleon Bonaparte
  4. James Madison - Fought the War of 1812
  5. James Monroe - Issued Monroe Doctrine
  6. Andrew Jackson - Killed most of the Iroquois Tribe; gagged Congress on slavery; fired whole Cabinet; created spoils system
  7. Abraham Lincoln - 'Nuff said
  8. Woodrow Wilson - Fought World War I
  9. Franklin Delano Roosevelt - Fought World War II; made New Deal
  10. John F. Kennedy - Again, 'nuff said
  11. Ronald Reagan - Major 1930's B-movie actor and governor or something
  12. Al Gore - Elected but denied the office because conservatives controlled the Supreme Court

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