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Massachusetts is one of the most important states in the United States of America.


Soapbox CAUTION: The following section contains subjective opinion on the matter. Conservatives and those with high blood pressure are advised to proceed carefully.

Despite being considered the most liberal state, Massachusetts is responsible for the evil scourge Mitt Romney. It is not known how he managed to prosper in such a liberal environment. However, John Kennedy was also from Massachusetts, so we forgive them.

The people of Massachusetts had enough sense not to vote for Richard Nixon even before the truth came out about Watergate. Unfortunately, the state voted for republican Scott Brown to replace the late Senator Ted Kennedy in January of 2010. He was disposed of in 2012, thankfully.

Massachusetts has one of the best pairs of Senators in the nation, sending Elizabeth Warren and Ed Markey to Capitol Hill.


It should be noted that this state is home to the most successful professional sports teams of our day with in Football (American style) and Baseball. Those teams are the New England Patriots (football) and the Boston Red Sox [WTF!?]. (baseball) Noam Chomsky also has residence in this most hallowed commonwealth.


Massachusetts is one of the original 13 colonies that broke away from Great Britain and signed the Declaration of Independence.

The Battle of Bunker Hill and the Battle of Concord happened there.

People from MassachusettsEdit

  • Alexander Graham Bell (the inventor of the telephone)
  • Mayor Quimby (The Simpsons)
  • Scott Brown (What the hell?)
  • Jill Stein (2012/2016 Green Party candidate and doctor)

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